Lap Painting...An Art in Itself

Today it is 9000 degrees. I'm trying to paint but because I'm using acrylics it is drying much faster than usual. It's coming along though. It's quite awkward to paint on a skateboard. It's such an odd shape and I have to keep shifting it around on my lap to work on it. Yes....on my lap cause I have nowhere else to paint. Whatever, it's worked for me for 30 or so years so why stop now! Who needs a studio? I've come to realize that in my lifetime I may never acquire enough money to have one. Soooooo.......lap painting it is for me! :P hmmm....sounds kind of dirty.....well it is! It's messy and everything around me and my lap are covered with paint.
I'm really just taking a short break cause I was sweating to death....how can I sweat when I'm not even moving?

Change of topic. I feel like I'm turning into a recluse. Well not turning into, cause I kinda was before....but I'm finding that I have less and less reasons to go out. I'm just not interested in anything outside my little bubble anymore. Maybe I'm becoming paranoid, or maybe I'm too self centered. I just can't see any reason to go and drink and waste time and money. But then again people who do that are more carefree and probably have alot more fun than me. But in my mind I just can't find anything good about it. I wish I could not care about doing something with my life. I wish my only goal was to work in retail and be happy. I don't feel like I need to get recognition but I feel like I need to do something a little more substantial than working at a clothing store, for my own sanity atleast.
But then isn't that what any artist wants?

I think all artists want to belong but at the same time want to stand alone. I know for myself being compared to another artist can be flattering but at the same time all I can think is I want to have my own style.

Oh really who cares though....what's the point in analyzing? All it does is take me away from doing the actual work.

I wish that sometimes I didn't have to think so much.

Anyhow back to my lap painting.............