Sunday, June 27, 2010

Some of my favourite pieces of art

~Lucien Freud

~John William Waterhouse

~Frida Kahlo

~William Bougereau

~Jean Michel Basquiat

~Nelson Shanks

~John Singer Sargent

~Jenny Saville

Jupiter in Gemini

"They are restless, and it is difficult for them to focus on any task for long, even accumulating money."

SHIT. I just accidentally erased my blog. Forget it I'm not writing all that again.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

dreams......fuck you

You know what I hate? dreaming that you are getting ready for work and then waking up and realizing you have to get ready again. That makes me so angry. I JUST WASHED MY HAIR IN MY DREAM THANK YOU VERY MUCH! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! and now I have to go to work after getting ready twice.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Naps suck.

Ok so I went to sleep after I got home from the day of hell at work and I woke up at 9:00pm. Bad call. Will I never learn that napping sucks for me? First of all it takes me a good hour atleast to fall asleep and then of course I wake up so late that now I'm gonna be up all night. Pooh. Now what? This sucks. To all the people who love naps.....SUCK IT! They are not good, they were invented by satan to fuck up my sleeping patterns.

Good morning!

Monday, June 21, 2010

I do nothing, therefore I am ......nothing

Let me start this off by saying I'm feeling extremely pissy today. Mostly with myself. I can't quite bring myself to do anything. You know those days where all you can do is daydream and wish you were somewhere else? well it's one of those days. I feel like I want to go for a walk and get some fresh air, but it's bloody hot out. I feel like I want to create something amazing but I feel like a blob of goo. I just can't do anything. I decided to cut my hair and I took some photos cause it's a little less time consuming and since I'm not officially a photographer I can take shitty photos and people can't say anything to me about it.
I've also been wasting my time looking at artists and photographers I love.....I shouldn't do that if I'm in a mood, all it does is make me feel like I'm not very good. Plus this book I'm reading on famous people who are mentally ill doesn't really help me. It kind of freaks me out to be honest. Fuck. This is one of my days off and I'm wasting it. I can't even relax. I can't even lay down on a couch and read a book leisurely cause we don't have a couch. I can't even lay in bed cause someones in there napping. So I get to sit at my computer desk and think of ways to amuse myself.
Is this what my life has come to? Right now it feels pretty fucking pathetic. I mean I know not everyday should be some grand spectacle but I mean all I do is work at my crummy job and then do nothing when I'm not there. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Some of you might be saying why not hang out with friends? well I don't have any. I used to, but not anymore. I think that's because of my own lack of interest in keeping a friendship and others lack of interest in me too. I'm not very fun I have to admit. I don't drink or smoke or do drugs. I'm not a fan of hanging out in bars with large groups of people. So where does that leave me? it leaves me sitting here writing about nothing in particular and trying to feel like I have something of interest to say.

Well I will leave you with some photos I took today.

Saturday, June 19, 2010


I'm featured on hamilton makes art's blog!!!! Check me out! WOO HOO!! I'm so happy I could die. Just kidding.....I like to quote little snippets from movies that I guess no one else would get but me. Yeah I'm lame but whatever I think I'm funny!

ART RULES!!! hahahaha. Okay I'll stop now.

Just click on the title and it will link you to hamilton makes art's blog!!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

I did it!

Well I'm proud to say that I have finished my artist statement and resume. In all honestly I never thought that I'd come to the point in my life where I would feel like it was worth my while to get into the art scene. Now more than ever I feel like it's my time to really work hard to get myself out there. I've been told all my life that I should be doing something with my art, but you know what.... I never felt ready until now. Some people get a late start and I'm fine with that. I'm a late bloomer as they say.
Now the next step is to submit my artwork to an art gallery.....or more than one, because I highly doubt that the first go is gonna land me a gallery. Who knows how long it might take me to get representation but I'm gonna do my best. In the mean time I will try to have as many shows as I can and work like crazy on my art.
There's so much stuff that I want to do and I'm really excited to get things going. I know the first step is that I'm going to have to do some more socializing and schmoozing. That's tough being that I'm basically a shut in. That means going out to James St. Art Crawls and meeting people. That freaks me out!! I'm definitely socially awkward and always either end up hanging around the outskirts of the action or looking like a total bitch. I need someone to hold my hand and drag me out! hahaha!
This weeks goal is to finish the pencil crayon drawing I have been working on. I need to decide what I will paint on my skateboard for the show, then draw the outline atleast. I think that I should also probably do a cover letter for my resume....but I don't think at this point its absolutely necessary. Hmmmmm what else? well there are a million more things but I think these are the most important at the moment.
Tomorrow is the first of my two days off. I just worked six days in a row so I'm really happy to be able to have some time to really sit down and concentrate on my art. Now I'm just trying to think of what else is on my list that I can do tonight! No rest for the wicked!!!!

Monday, June 7, 2010

WAAHHH I need a

Well I picked up my skateboard today for the show coming up. I'm pretty excited to be a part of it. I've never painted on a skateboard before so we'll see how it goes.

I feel like I have so many art projects on the go right now and I don't know where to start. I'm trying to finish my series of pencil crayon drawings and also work on a new series of paintings. Also my little side project of crossword drawings....they are mostly just for fun but I love doing them. I'm not sure if it's better for me to concentrate on one project at a time or to work on them all at once. I guess it doesn't really matter, that's just how I work. I have a short attention span when it comes to focusing on my art,I think I need a bunch of different things available to me so when I'm bored of one I can work on another.

I really wish I had a studio. I just have this feeling that I probably won't ever have a proper one. It really sucks to be stuck at a little desk with all your stuff crammed onto it that constantly fall off. I'd say the space I get to work with is about 2 ft by 4 ft. Meaning it's fucking TINY! most of the time I have my work sitting on my lap and my supplies on my desk.
Sometimes it really gets on my nerves but I really should be used to it since that's pretty much how I've worked my whole life.
Maybe a studio would be too overwhelming for me.....hahaha. Maybe being squashed into a little space is what helps my creativity.
I can't deny that I'm extremely jealous of anyone with a studio though. I feel like I deserve one. Maybe one day! I have hope.

In the last six months that I've lived at this apartment I think I've done some of my best paintings. So maybe all the hell and stress I've been through has helped me with that. I guess that might explain the darkness that seems to be coming out in my artwork. Though I would give anything to have some degree of normalcy at the moment.
Being continuously stressed might be helping my art right now but in the long run it's not doing much good for my health.

My goals for the rest of this year are to move, first and foremost. Get an art show. Get my stupid feet fixed. Hopefully start making enough money off my art to quit my stupid job!! hahahaha.....ok well that's a little far fetched but maybe in time it will happen.